Clem and Clem beat my head with hammers

Dear Germany,
I like you. I think we should hold hands at recess. You are a lot of fun. I mean, who could not have fun inventing things like the world´s largest wine festival?? I think that it was a blasty blast! I mean many countries like to celebrate good company, or the harvest or some sort of conquest. Nope. Not you. You like to celebrate the intake of copious amounts of alcohol in a dizzying and confusing environment. That is what it is all about.
Love
Avril
In case you have no idea what I am talking about, I went to the world´s largest wine festival in Bad Durkheim this weekend. It was intense. When you think of wine, you usually think of classy glasses and good food. Not at this festival. It was the tumblers and the celebration of wurst that was going on. I have to give the Germans props. They really do know how to party on a large scale. Unfortunatley that kind of partying always ends with two giant brothers named Clem pounding my head with their two giant hammers. Also named Clem.
That´s all, back to the preparation of my presentation for tomorrow.